Things are going pretty well, today I have to go with my dad for an MRI on his back but everyone seems in pretty good spirits.
Last night I had a dream I haven’t had in over a decade. I dreamt I had joined the priesthood. Now here is a little background, I grew up Catholic (Irish Catholic, the priest we were closest too had some pagan type ideas and I have since found out its a “Irish” tendency to lump in weird things) I honestly don’t think its an Irish thing anymore, I think rather its a tradition that may have started with the Irish but has become more of a Poor Catholic sorta belief.
When I was growing up, I had always considered the priesthood, this sounds wierd but my parents told me they would totally support that decision when I was younger (the reason looking back this sounds wierd is my family is comprised of Bikers, Nam Vets and criminals, but the whole family would have accepted that, and would have been completely supportive).
Between the ages of 17-20 I had seriously considered attending a Seminary (the only time in that time period it wasn’t something I considered was when me and Sage (my wife) were going out the first time. When she dumped me I almost immediately joined but fortunately for my current circumstance my father talked me out of it and told me I should wait until it wasn’t a reaction from a breakup. Sage and I got back together so it was a moot point, but its something I have always considered when I was younger.
Last night I dreamt something happened to Sage (not a break up situation, more like a death I believe) and I joined the seminary after whatever happened, happened. Now that I am awake and writing this down most of the dream is disappearing like smoke, but I felt I should write down what I could.
I think it made an impression on me because I haven’t even considered myself following Catholicism for a long time. I have strayed for a long time from the church and I honestly don’t think I can go back. There is so much hypocrisy in the church, not only the church but all of Christianity is built on hypocrisy. Don’t get me wrong, the message is a wonderful message full of love and I am not at all faulting the message. Rather I am faulting the religious hierarchy for becoming a bloated, hypocritical bastard that has nothing to do with the religious belief and who instead of promoting the word of love now promotes intolerance.
This goes for all actual churches, Christianity, Islam, Judaism all are hypocrites, all of these religions have become shadows of what the “word” is. They all teach the opposite of their base beliefs and I totally have become disgusted with all Monotheisms.
Actually thinking about this, I think all of this thought pattern may have sprung from watching the Hercules marathon yesterday on sci-fi channel. Yesterday I sat watching and thought how much more relaxing it would be to believe in a pantheon of gods, all who had human foilables and you could understand why god/nature/destiny could be cruel and/or kind.
I have considered looking deeper into Paganism, my only problem with that is most of the current groups in my area do the “new age” paganism, they mix the different deities together in prayers and worship (like I have heard several members of a local group at the same time they offer to Diana, Demeter, Pele, Inana) The funny thing is these groups don’t realize that the goddesses/gods they worship in historical context were believed to be highly jealous of each other and it would have been an insult to worship them together.
I hate the “new age” movement, I would rather some old fashioned paganism as in worshiping only one pantheon and kinda sticking to something “old” rather then reinventing old religions into a mishmash of separate deities into one worship. New age also bothers me (at least the group around here) with the “man bashing” they tend to be middle aged women who are bitter with men and in their “circles” do the same exact thing to men that they are bitter were done to them.
Sexism is just wrong either way, both sexes have something to offer and I dont think having a penis makes you better or worse then not having one.
hmm, my family was buddhist for 5 years, that went nicely, maybe I will look into buddhism.
Well bus is coming, have to run, sorry to only get half a thought down, just rambling today.
*note from 9/2018… wow I had some entitled man privilege there about sexism on both sides…