Dreams 11-5-06

All last night I had a single long dream that began when I fell asleep and continued til I woke up at 6:30. I don’t remember some aspects (actually a lot of it) in the last 30 minutes since I woke up. I needed to take some time before I wrote it down because the ending of the dream really kind of freaked me out.

The short of it was that everyone I know was involved. It started like Ocean’s 11 or any other big organized theft. We were all involved in stealing something important, which we successfully did. For some reason a short time later we all decided to rip off a grocery store the same way. Just before we did it I told everyone to abort and I walked away from that (something was wrong). The strange part is that by the time this part of the dream was occuring it was almost like we were playing a table top game. I mean we were doing these acts with our hands, but it would be like we would declare what we were doing and then do it.

The only difference with my real life friends and family (and almost all of you that I know in real life was involved) was the fact that W seemed different. It was her, but she wasn’t actually human, just looked it (and I was ok with that). Well by the end of the dream W, my sister and some large creature were in our bedroom from the old Alabama apartment that W. and I shared before we got married.

It started when W.and I were sitting there talking. All of a sudden she looked up at me and said she loved me and she was sorry it had to happen, and that she would see me again. All of a sudden she sat down on the floor (it was wooden, not carpeted like it was in real life) on a sheet and then all of a sudden she started bleeding from wounds all over her body, while she was bleeding out she wrapped the sheet around her (much like a burial shroud). I was stunned for a moment then I see my sister step into the room and some sort of large creature with huge claws behind her. For some reason I know this creature did this to her and I stand up saying I am going to kill it. 

My sister steps in front of me and tells me she can’t let me hurt “him”. I pull my hand out of my pocket, point it like a gun (much like as kids we would make our hands into little guns) and I distinctly say “bang, bang, bang, bang” at my sister. I then point my finger at the creature, declare loudly “bang bang bang” and then I loudly declare like I was doing a table top game that I was going to chew through its neck until its head came off. 

I then look down (I didn’t see anything happen) and the whole front of my shirt is covered in blood, blood dripping out of my mouth and chin and I see the creature headless. I then notice my sister dying, her breaths coming pretty shallow from four bullet holes in her. I was pretty distraught, I apologized to her but told her I would have done it again if she got in the way of avenging W.

I then woke up feeling pretty shitty my wife died and I had killed my sister (whom I love very very much). This last part of the dream is what really made me forget the majority of the dream before the incident. 

It was kind of fucked up.

Dreams 11-06-06

I had more dreams again last night, I know they spanned across the whole night but can only remember chunks.

The first part had me over on Meridian street by the furniture stores. I had just gotten off a bus and was super pissed about something.the Wife was stomping off with a female friend (we probably had an arguement, its kind of dim right on what happened) and I just unbuttoned the white button up shirt and started walking home.

The second part took place outside our house. Evidently we were living at a ranch or farm type house. I was still pissed about something (it was I believe the same dream, but it was later last night) andthe Wife and I could hear a car/truck outside of our property. There was a large solid wall around our property so we had to walk up to the front driveway. Thats when we noticed three people messing around near a car. There was a younger male (probably early 20’s), a younger female in her late 20’s, and a redheaded older male, with a bushy mustache in his late 30’s or a bit older.

They had teeth clippings and tail clippings from our horses. I walked up demanding to know what the fuck they were doing. They just kind of smile at me threateningly and declare they were checking on the conditions of “their” horses (implying they were going to take them). I knocked the mane hair out of the woman’s hands and stepped up to the older male, grabbed the small bag of teeth clippings (much like hoof clippings, don’t know how my dream interpreted it as teeth) and threw it out of his hands.

The older male all of a sudden got threatening, and pulled out a pistol pointing it atthe Wife telling me to watch what I was doing or I would regret it. He then went to put it away and I flipped out because he had threatened the wifey. I knocked it out of his hands (there was a definite look of surprise from the guy) and I kicked him squarely between the legs and then as he dropped to his knees kicked him in the face. While he was sprawled out I turned and before the girl could do anything I punched her a couple of times, she dropped and I boot partied on her for a few seconds. 

The third (younger) guy had left (or at this stage of the dream not sure if my dream even considered him there to begin with). I turned around and went back up to the older man. I had noticed I hadn’t yelled or screamed at him yet. As I walked up he was starting to apologize and saying to take it out on him and leave the girl alone. I just flipped out and started kicking his head and jaw. I was also starting to scream at him, telling him I was going to fuck him up bad for threatening my wife. After a few minutes I stopped and he was trying to apologize for pointing the gun atthe Wife. He then said not to punish the girl but to take it out on him.

I kicked him a few times more in the chest (I didn’t want to give him lasting brain damage beyond what might have happened the first couple of kicks, after those I aimed at the lower face/jaw). I then leaned real close and told him how if I was going to take this out on him I would fuck the girl up with my boots and he would have to live for the rest of his life knowing he caused her so much pain trying to be tough.

At this point is when I woke up, part of me was bothered that I would even threaten that. I have no doubt if someone threatened a friend/family, most especially if they threatenedthe Wife that I would do exactly what I did in my dream by beating the crap out of someone and not caring about what the police might do. I think I was bothered even more with the idea that if the girl was involved in threatening my wife I may follow through on that last part.

I am normally a nice guy. Only two or three times in my life have I flipped like that.

Once when I was 16 and I was hit full on in the face with a baseball bat (this is why a large chunk of my teeth have issues), I took the baseball from the guy and beat him with it til he wouldn’t/couldn’t get up.

Once when we were in the graveyard at age 19/20 and I just started kicking the guy down a hill that was fucking with gravestones and being threatening (although that time was somewhat funny, I was standing on my left leg with my right leg sticking straight out and I hopped at the guy kicking him down the hill).

A couple of times Weylin saved people when I was wasted and they were trying to score withthe Wife, thanks yoggi-bear.

Most recent time was when the Wife, myself and were walking outside of bellis fair a couple of years ago and an Arabic man in a volkswagon bus with Canadian license plate, zoomed by us as we crossed the road. He was screaming, yelling and I flipped him off and told him to fuck off or suck my dick or something insulting (I don’t remember what specifically now). He spun his bus around the parking lot and parked behind us about 20 feet. He continued to scream at us.

I continued to find this funny and would yell back and then his tone changed so I paid a bit more attention and he pulled his hand out like it was a pistol and aimed it atthe Wife and make shooting motions. That flipped me out and I walked up to his van and poked him in the forehead with my finger asking him what the fuck he was doing. The absolute look of surprise on his face, that I walked up to him and did that now is increadibly funny. At the time I really really really wanted to haul him out of that van and beat him until he couldn’t move. The only thing that kept me only poking him in the forehead hard with my finger wasthe Wife screaming at me not to do anything that would make me go to jail. Part of me was hoping he would pull a real weapon, but I did realize I wasn’t justified in doing anything else (and probably wasn’t justified in poking him in the head, but he was threatening my wife).

I stepped away as my wife’s wise words kept me on a much needed leash (thanks wifey, I really do mean that). He just stared at me like I was a crazy man and he drove off and we continued on our way.

I think the dream bothered me so much because if circumstances in my later teen/ early twenty life had been different I might have followed a not so nice path in life. Sometimes I get so angry and I just shove it inside and smile at people, I am terrified of someday losing it on someone though and doing what I did in the dream to someone in real life. I don’t think those circumstances would be easy to come by, but the possibility worries me

PS. I do realize this is all probably because of last week’s midterms and tomorrow’s midterms.

Dreams 10-14-06

I had a some dreams last night. I think it was actually the same dream continued after I woke up.

The first one had me walking down railroad avenue. From Holly street towards the bus station (on the Bagelry side). I was coming down there to visit the wife. She worked at some bagelry/wild garlic like place in the Cellophane Square store (was no longer a music store, purely a large hole in the wall restaurant). The front part of the restuarant was wide open, a few tables that I walked past towards where there was a group of people. I could see as I walked towards her. I then noticed an old friend of mine named Doug was there. I walked up to him and extended my hand when all of a sudden he it me in the face (more of a slap/hit, then a real punch). I was stunned for a moment, then I picked him up and threw in through a table and started beating his face.

Thats where that dream stopped. I didn’t know why he did that, but I thought it had to do something with the Wife. I think there was a second dream right after this that did more explaining but I don’t remember now.

The next dream had us walking down Holly St. (all the way at the bottom, walking back up where video extreme is/was). and I were just chatting away when we noticed people running towards us. It was more that they were running from something, there were screams and some fell while I could hear sirens in the background. There was no gun shots, but for some reason we ended up hiding in a old store and something kept poking people, making them die. I think it was some sort of blade thing that people kept accidently touching and then dying and/or shifting because they touched. When I woke up I had a much clearer idea of what it was (and why we were hiding) but of course the important details like that have slipped out of my memory now that I have woken up enough to come out to the computer and post it. All I know is it was another “end of the world” type scenario (probably because I watched Jericho last night on DVR).

Dreams 10-10-06

Last night I had a horrible dream about me and the wife living in a huge “futuristic” city. Things were starting to go wrong and I knew that someone was launching some sort of nuclear weapons (actually they were aliens launching something else, but it was similar in effect). 

No one would believe me and I kept trying to tell people to get out of the city. As it turned out, not only was a couple of these bombs going off in the city, but some had gone off in the ocean we were a port on, causing a huge tidal wave to be coming in.

Then the dream flipped around a little bit and we were running through ruins and across countryside trying to avoid being killed.

It really did hurt a lot when my left arm was splintered off my body (bone splinters jutting from my upper arm bone), but I kept going, for some reason didn’t bleed out.

I then woke up covered in sweat, I was going to try and go to work this morning, but no that wont work, too wobbly and hot. Sucked down some of my favorite stuff (Dayquil) and I don’t feel nearly as wobbly. No matter what I have to go to class today, our attendance is part of our grade in both my classes today and if I lose some of those points it needs to be because I am puking, not because I am sweaty, lol I can write notes if I am sweaty.

Oh, and I never did post this, last weekend I had a dream about busty naked girls who were farming my coffee bean farm. The dream didn’t get too explicit, but it was pretty damn cool.

Dream 9-12-06

Last night I had a pretty intense dream.

We were all living in New York City, we were for some reason down in a huge tunnel system. It wasn’t quite the Subway or anything, but for some reason we were all down below and we were around hockey equipment.

Something fell out of a sky, kind of like ash, but it was something different. All of a sudden people started speaking different languages (and some not human languages). It was almost like a “Tower of Babel” story. People started taking after the language they spoke and the groups that were together seemed to develop their own languages.

All of a sudden shit hit the fan. Different groups were going crazy and trying to kill, eat, maim, or do horrible things to those that were not part of their subculture. We spent a lot of time running in the tunnels. We came up once and saw a group of people trying to move across a bridge/scaffolding area that was mostly I beams. On the other side were what used to be people and animals that had mutated and they were firing weird things from their body that were acid, trying to kill the people crossing the bridge. Much like creatures from Half Life.

We ran back into the tunnels again and were attacked by a single human with four large black cats, for some reason the only way we could kill the cats (they were trying to eat us) was for me to break their necks, once that was done I had to crush them under me until they stopped moving (had to do it to the human that was with them as well). The wierd part was the cats and the human could speak with each other(actually the horrifying part was having to kill the cats, the human didn’t bother me as much).

I woke up freaked out, laid there for about an hour. I think there might have been more, but I thankfully forgot it.

Hypocrisy

I was watching t.v. and saw that they finally approved Plan B. I am very happy to see it, anything to help prevent unwanted pregnancies is good, especially if its not invasive abortion. However, I noticed several fundie/conservative groups are up in arms about it.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t necessarily blame people being against abortion. I can understand the thought that human life is inviolate, its just we disagree on when life starts. That is ok. My issue is these same Christian fundies who spout how human life, even one, is important, yet I don’t see any of these Christian Fundies objecting to us bombing another country, or objecting to the military being used for pretty much anything.

Fundie churches are like this to. I have never heard of a Fundie church (or honestly any Christian church, except certain Catholic Dioceses, ever objecting to our war in Iraq. The same churches that spout how important it is to save even a single human life that is lost to abortion, doesn’t even raise an eyebrow at us killing other people in other countries. The last time I read the bible, Jesus was pretty damn clear about not raising your fist against another, turn the other cheek, Thou Shalt Not Kill, and many other obvious things that indicated taking any human lives was wrong. Yet all these conservative “Christian” people are pro-Iraq. I don’t think Jesus approves of us going to another country period, hell he didn’t believe in protecting himself, he certainly would never agree to invading another country, even to give our country safety.

What is worse is when Christians start quoting things from the Old Testament. They start saying an “Eye for an Eye” and how the Isrealites were allowed to defend themselves. Well if they believe in the old testament then they should still be Jewish. Jesus supposedly changed all the rules, including sacrifices, warfare, etc. You can’t just pick and choose from the bible to match your need. Either you follow the teachings of peace and love that Jesus taught, making you a Christian, or you follow the old testament and your Jewish (well that is a simplification, I realize you need to follow more then just the Old Testament to be Jewish, but most Christians are not very informed and get confused of you start talking about the Torah, etc.).

I get confused, I know many Christians, about 1/10th of them object to war (the rest are either pro-war/Iraq or at the very least it doesn’t effect them either way), and half of that is they only object to Iraq, not warfare in general. It kind of turns my stomach when these same people claim to follow the teachings of such a gentle man as Jesus. If a Christian truly followed the path of Jesus, they would stand out of the pack and would garner my respect. Its funny, most of the people I know who protest the war are hippy/pagan types, types you don’t normally see in church (although there are a few that are church goers I am sure), yet those that proclaim their faith (and who drive huge, expensive, gas guzzlers and work for questionable places, but this is a rant for later), are the ones that object to Plan B birth control pills, but don’t even blink an eye when people are killed in Iraq (not even getting into the children killed by us in Iraq, just talking anyone).

This is why I am a Deist. Yes I believe in God/Divine, and yes I believe every single religion in the world has lost the true message in exchange for power/prestige/riches. If there is a rapture, I have a feeling all those who believe they are saved are going to be the ones burning in hell (oh, and later will be a rant on the hubris of those who have the “In case of rapture, this car will be unmanned” bumper stickers).

I would do more, but this is probably long enough right now.

Night/Day/and stuff.

Woke up this morning at 5:10am. I am sad for the Wife because she was awake before then and is having problems sleeping. I awoke from two dreams last night.

The first dream was a more realistic version of Street Fighter. I was one of the “mutants” we were all rounded up and someone threatened me, so I challenged them to “Mortal Combat” (yes, wrong game, but that was the key word to engage in one on one death match). The reason I say Street Fighter when I am yelling “Mortal Combat” because someone threatened me was the fact it was an animal like person much like the character Blanka.

The second dream was in the ocean(which somehow came out of the first dream). I was looking over footage, bad film footage of strange underwater things. One example was a whale that was used as a torpedo against other ships. There were brief clips of sea monsters and other various things in the water.

Neither dream was very clear, the Street Fighter dream was very short, and the ocean dream was sort of sporadic and even though it was mostly looking over film footage, the part where I was in the ocean trying to stay above water, knowing that there were 2,000 feet of water below me and no land in site (and no boat) kind of freaked me out.

Today I will be working a full day, then coming home and probably napping til wife gets off work. I really do feel bad for her.

The news is going on how another terror plot was foiled, now your not allowed to have toothpaste, bottled water, and anything else like that on carry-on luggage. Yes, I feel even safer. Thank you Homeland Security for making us even more like a police state. This mean someone is going to try and smuggle a bomb in using a baby, they will outlaw babies?

Wait a minute, that is not a bad idea, maybe I can sell an extremist on that idea, so he will get caught and they will outlaw babies.

Yes, now my very tired and rambling mind needs to plan how we can outlaw children. Americans are gullible enough to buy it, I am sure of this.

I am tired, need more coffee so I am out for now.

Dreams 7-29-18

Last night I had a dream that really kind of bothered me.

It was in an old house my parents had rented when I was a kid, on Iron Street. There were some differences, mainly my parents were the same age they are now (as was I), there were flourescent lights behind plexiglass advertisements on the corner of the wall/ceiling and my parents were sitting there being a bit spacey.

A younger brunette with a very alternative look was there as well. She introduced herself to me, but something bothered me when she did so (and I cannot seem to remember her name). She followed me around my parents house while I got some coffee and lunch. I noticed some weird plastic cap thingees in the sink. 

The dark haired girl with the peircings and chopped up tee-shirt kept coming on to me (no it was not a representation of the wife), she was in the corner of my dream house somewhere and I knew it). She even went so far as to push her ass up against me every chance she got. But I continued to ignore her.

I went back out into the living room, just as I was doing that, my little brother Bear was shooting up drugs (heroin). I freaked out on him and he said my parents were doing it as well. It dawned on me that they were nodding out and I immediately understood the plastic thingees were needle caps.

I freaked out, went into the living room and confronted my parents. They said that yes, they are doing it. I found out it was from the dark haired alternative girl that they started and it was too late for them to now quit. 

I immediately woke up. Its not that my parents haven’t tried all drugs (they have), but they have never been fond of forcing drugs into your veins directly. I also realize this dream most likely because my aunt Ines had a heart attack last week (sounds even more severe then my mother’s two years ago). She lived a life of a junkie, not my parents sometimes doing drugs or drinking, but a full blown, sticking needles in her arm with her daughter (my cousin) Sarah.

I worry about my mom. She is the youngest of them (Ines is 59, my mom 57, and the oldest aunt Ardis is 62 I believe). My mom is likely to be hurt and cry if something happens to Ines. Sadly enough Ines never really acted like she cared about my mom (most junkies don’t/can’t care about others while fucked up) and never really contacted my mom, after her big heart attack. So I honestly don’t feel emotional at all about my middle aunt having a heart attack. Of course I don’t want to see her die, but selfishly that is mostly so I don’t have to see my mom suffer.

Well, that is it for now, exhausted, maybe I can get back to sleep.

Quasi Weird Dream

I dreamt I was in an accounting class (much like the ones I have taken last couple of quarters). Strange thing was, it was in the old Bellingham High School (not the redone new version). With cracked pipes, ceiling falling in, old wooden desks and drafty windows.

The girl behind me was freaking out because we were expected to know Chapter 11 from the previous quarter, but we had never covered it. I kept trying to explain it to her but she wouldn’t listen to me.

So I left class, there was some interchange with other students and I went downstairs with Sage to meet up with ‘s mom. Who turned out in the dream to not be a pasty white woman with many neurosis, rather it was a rather large black woman, who was much thinner then she used to be. She was very proud of her weight loss and soon they were going to fix her myopic eyesite (she wore huge binocular like glasses).

We got in the car and started heading down Iowa, it was snowing and she was all over the road (I have a feeling she really couldn’t see) but I still trusted her driving. We got almost all the way down Iowa, then his mom crashed the car because of an oncoming rush of people, hitting a little old lady weighing maybe 40lbs in her wheelchair.

I ran outside of the car and saw she was pretty skeletal. At this exact point a brief thought crossed my mind that she couldn’t be living (and I have a feeling at this point my dream could really have gone awry with living dead). Rather the little old lady looked up and asked me to help, that they were picking on her.

I picked the little old lady (she wasn’t quite as skeletal) and moved back in the direction of where the gaggle of old people (they turned out to all be old people). Evidently a group of young punks were picking on them (probably 15-22 years old). There were about 12 or 15 of the little punks and I waded in and kicked them out, I was also telling W to call the cops. Most scattered (I was super pissed at them, while holding the little old lady). 

One of the younger ones walked up and tried talking shit. For some reason I knew he was Marshall King’s little brother (but thinking about it, at his age he would have to be Marshall’s kid, but strangely enough he looked like Rob, an old friend Jay’s little brother). Some words were exchanged and eventually he backed down. I then began walking towards the hospital with the little old lady still in my arms, crying because they picked on her.

God I woke up pissed this morning (and way earlier then I have been waking up this week (about 7:15 or so)>

Dreams 6-15-2006

Last night was the night of weird dreams. I only really remember one.

A very large group of us went to an old abandoned movie theater, they were doing a one shot “slasher” flick. Pretty much everyone I know was there, including my little brother, but no Wife. 
We sat down in this musty, mildewy theater to watch a very traditional like slasher. There were four or five girls there who acted as Theater helpers, bringing food and stuff. One of the girls was incredibly fat, but as the movie ended I realized she had a bubble of slime on her side (as if her skin was putrefying), she wasn’t dead or anything, she said it was an infection.
For some reason I still had a pair of green Nitrile gloves from work (they  are some fancy new rubber gloves I get to wear at work that protect from the epoxys/chemicals, they look exactly like disposable gloves, except green). When the movie was over the phone rang. The theater room was just like any theater you sit in, except at the top area (where you walk in) is a concession stand right there, with a couple of couches, sort of like a one room theater instead of a foyer, then a room).
I answered the phone and the person on the other end told me we had won a trip to the next filming of the next slasher movie. We were given a choice of three locations (they were making three movies), one was on an island, another up in the woods and he only mumbled the third. The whole group (including everyone in my BT game except wifey) and the additional people were clamoring for the island. Something was bothering me though and I didn’t like the situation.
For some reason I decided to leave separate from everyone else. I went out the back door while everyone else went out the front door (looked like we were on Samish Way). They wandered down the street talking. I stopped just under the eaves of the theater roof and looked back. For some reason I went back inside and heard the fat chick talking on her cell phone that “it was successful”. She was really starting to ooze. At this exact moment I was thirsty and for some reason looked in the fridge at the concession stand to see if they had any cans of coke or pepsi. Inside I saw three shelves of “cakes”. They looked exactly like skinny/tiny cheerleaders, three to a baking sheet with no arms/legs (they weren’t full size people, it looked like a normal size full baking sheet with miniature people). The fat chick smiled and told me they were cakes. Something in me said they weren’t and I smiled at her and backed away.
I stepped back out the door and I noticed it was raining. I looked at my gloved hands and noticed there was slime running off of them. For some reason I was extremely worried about that slime and put it under the runoff from the roof to clean off the gloves. I double checked the rest of my body to make sure the slime never touched my body.
I then stepped around the corner of the theater and towards the road. It was a small road that intersected with Samish way. There were three cars at the stop sign (third one was just coming down the hill to the stop, the other two were already stopped). The first car had a young japanese male driving with a dust face mask covering his nose and mouth. He drove out into Samish, as he pulled out a Semi hit him coming down Samish, rolling over the middle of his car and crushing it beneath its weight.
The second car disappeared from view as I watched the third car come to a stop. It was an old man driving, for some reason there was no front windshield. He was watching me as he stopped. The car slowly (as in slow motion) stopped, and flipped over its front end, much like a bicycle does when someone hits the front brake. The entire time he was watching me as the top of the car hit the ground and slowly crushed him, gore flying everywhere.
I crossed the street, ignoring what was happening. For some reason I knew if I stopped I would be the next to die. Across the little street (parallel to Samish) was a gas station. I crossed by the pumps and just as I got past I saw what looked to be a go-cart looking thing made to resemble an SUV crash into the gas pump, the look of horror on the younger girl (probably 17) as the gas pump exploded, her skin slowly erupted into flames, as her face started to melt off. The worst part was her screaming.
Thats when I woke up.