Opinion: Tired of the “Freedom in Iraq” Rhetoric

I think I have had enough “arm chair” soldiers talk how we are giving freedom to the Iraqi people. In fact we are invading them and occupying them. Many of my friends who do believe in the war claim that terrorists are now attacking our troops. I hate to break it to you but I would consider them Iraqi Freedom Fighters.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not saying I want a single one of our troops to die, I also do believe that the soldiers over there need to do whatever they can to maintain thier own lives, and unfortunately that means killing Iraqis.

However, for us to invade another country is not moral. Especially since President Bush forced the issue of WMD and Terrorism when in fact Saddam had no weapons of mass destruction (evidently Blix was right) and no affiliations with Al-Queda. In fact it has been shown that since day one of his office (before 9-11) Bush has had his eyes on Iraq. I realize there is a lot of oil, and he is probably wishing to finish what his daddy started but he was wrong in what he did.

In 1936 Hitler claimed he was “pre-emptively” striking and reclaiming lost lands, actually if you read history much of Hitler’s reasons for taking over Austria and the rest of the little countries before Poland was the exact same reason that Bush gave.

We did not have the right to invade another country “pre-emptively” especially when the U.N. told us it was wrong. We are not infallible and we are just swinging our big dick around telling the world we will do whatever we want. We sound like a bully.

I have detoured off my original rant so I will go back to it.

How can we expect Iraqis to accept us with military and governmental control. Supposedly we came to give them freedom but the new government on June 30th is not allowed to make laws, and not allowed to do many other things. Exactly how is that giving control back to the Iraqis. 

We have an army that consists mostly of 135,000 Western, White and Christian in a Muslim world. Exactly how well would we handle if China came over here with 1.35 million troops (thats exactly the same ratio of troops to us that we have to Iraqis, they only have 10% of our population), what if they invaded us took over and said for our own “good” we would have to listen to them. We are not U.N. backed, we have no rights to be over there and we are being a big old bully.

I love my country, but I hate the weird “fervor” that has brewed, I wish some people would read more history, we are so very close to Berlin 1936 its not even funny. I do know if Bush wins, when I get out of school I may very well decide to find a foriegn place to live til America gets its head out of its ass.

Oh, by the way, I plan on becoming president in 2024. I have just purchased http://www.voteforlucky.com but it wont be valid until its registered by NIC (up to 3 days). I figure I can start my political career by slowly building up a site on why I should be president 🙂

*note from 9/2018 who would have thought this could be a serious thing, after all we voted Trump into office…

Bad Dream and a little stress

Well I woke up this morning to a not so good dream. 

I was driving down Meridian; out by WalMart when over one of the little rises in the road I noticed that there was a huge lineup of cars. The unfortunate fact was the speed limit right there just past WalMart is 50mph. So needless to say I careened into the back of a car. The person following behind me then smashed into me and then I woke up when the vehicle behind him (a semi-truck loaded down with one of those giant Milk Containers that drive up to Lynden on that road) smashed through the car behind me and into me.

I woke up, heart beating fast when I realized for some weird reason that my little brother’s girlfriend was almost young enough to be my daughter (15 years younger then me). That then weirded me out.

I am now up, with Orph sitting beside me on the computer desk. I now need to start commenting out my ADA program (I forgot to do that yesterday). Then we got to go to Calculus and then tonight I go to Aikido. I am just worried that I don’t have time for Aikido.

Yesterday I went by the Student Office and they arranged to do a “Credit” check, which means it will tell me exactly what classes I am missing from my GURs that I need to graduate. I then went to Financial Aid to find out what I need to do when I exceed my credits. The lady was nice, and she did give me a rundown of the procedure. However I don’t think she is good at math.

She told me that once you reach 225 credits is when they cut you off of Financial Aid. I am at 140 credits and she believes that by Summer 2004 I will have reached 225 credits. Well Summer of 2004 is only two quarters away, even if I got 15 credits spring and summer that’s only 30 total (raising me to 185 credits, counting this quarter as well). That’s still 40 credits short. I think she meant summer of 2005, which means I got 4 more quarters without having to freak out. Problem is I have almost double that before I am done. I am finally done with the majority of my GUR’s (hence why I am getting a Credit check/evaluation). That means I am down to the meat and bones of 96 credits worth of CS/Math/Science and a few extra science that they slap in there.

Damn I hate W.C.C. (the community college I went to) they had me on their “fast-track” program which in the end wasn’t worth that much and I lost almost 43 credits worth of classes, actually lost is a misnomer, they count them towards my financial aid, but only count them as electives.

I still got so far left to go; I keep thinking there has to be a better way to do this. But I figure worst case scenario if they do cut my financial aid I will just go to work, and go to school 6 credits a quarter (I can usually swing $600 a quarter if I am working, that’s only $200 a month).

Well the cat is getting into something; I will be posting a little bit later.

Typical

Weylin

Well, here I am venting my frustration about my living situation. First I want to make clear that my roommate Weylin is one of my best friends and one of the best roommates I have had.

However, here is the situation and why I am so frustrated.

When we moved in together we asked Weylin to make sure if he could give us a quarter’s notice (90 days) if he was going to move out. Now that’s more then anyone technically needs to do but with our finances so precariously balanced we need as much notice as possible to make sure everything goes through, Weylin said he was more then happy to do that.

Well Weylin has indicated that October he may move out (although never clearly made that the deadline, he has hummed and hawed about it saying it would be at least October before he moved if not longer). Well I find out three days ago that he may want to move out mid September and was curious if he could only pay half a month’s rent for September.

Now don’t get me wrong its fine if he moves out. But he cant give me a definite answer on when he will move out so now I got to assume he is out September 15th so I don’t spend the money badly. My biggest issue is sure, I can knock half the rent off for him moving out but only half of his monthly payment is rent, the other half is all the other bills (internet, cable, phone, electricity, etc) and I technically should only knock $90 bucks off what he would owe me for leaving early (because the rest of the half’s month of expenses are for bills accrued in August which he was here fully). I will probably knock off the whole half amount because he is a friend but once again when roomates out it smacks me in the ass.

We had planned that if in September if we got enough student loans to live by ourselves we were going to give Weylin at least 3 months notice to move out (and maybe 6 months if he needed it. Yet it seems 90-day notice isn’t reciprocal. I would never dream before this situation of giving less then 3 months notice to whoever lived with us.

The worst part about this is Weylin wont actually come talk to us, we find out they are planning on moving out by reading his girlfriend’s Lisa LJ and then I have to confront him about what’s going on. Not once has he come forward to keep us informed on what’s happening. I realize its probably because he is worried we will be mad, but what makes me mad is I have to approach him about when he is moving, he should be man enough to walk up to us and explain what is going on and not have me approach him about it.

Don’t get me wrong, I still consider Weylin one of my best friends and this doesn’t undercut that at all, I have lived with him before and its all good. I just wish Weylin wouldn’t be so passive about what’s going on.

I do think I might tell Weylin that he needs to move by October 1st, evidently the 90 days notice isn’t a point anymore and maybe its just good to remove all roommate type situations now.

Once again I need to make absolutely clear is that I am more frustrated that Weylin will not actually come out and talk to us on his own about the situation and keep us informed. That is more frustrating then actually quibbling over whether or not he is staying til October 1st.

I guess I am just pissed he wont just talk to us about it, I have to follow him around and try to force the conversation.

Counterstrike Drama

Ok, here is the lowdown. for those of you who didn’t know I run a Counter-Strike clan. Basically its an online video game and I am responsible for about 12 people on a team as we compete against other teams. Well we ended up friends with a clan called PiS, I have always thought overall they were pretty cool but some of them have always been kinda wierd.

Thier leader “Carbon” however tends to get online while drunk, slap people around and treat his server as his own little fiefdom. I like him though so I never bothered to tell him I hated playing on his server because of the following reasons.

1. He has lame ass mods on the server, the stupid ass extra blood actually gets in the way of trying to increase your skills in the game (it makes huge amounts of blood spurt from you if you been shot and seeps through walls and stuff and generally reveals where you are at, and this is never used in a match).

2. Its not-Friendly Fire, which means you cannot hurt your own teammate, once again this is an opposite setting of the leagues we are in so it actually makes us less good at shooting the enemy without hitting our own friends.

3. Many of the admins for PiS are assholes and kick/slap/slay/ban for no apperent reasons

4. The maps are stupid ass custom maps that also dont have anything to do with matches

But I have endured litterely day after day of phone calls from “Carbon” bitching and whining about the server, about the host who rents him the server and about everything in general. Mainly because I like him and I am a nice guy, however everyone else in the house has started to call Carbon my girlfriend because of the frequent calls. However one of my members ranted about the server on our “flames forum” and Carbon freaked out. Now he is all whiney about how I would let someone express thier views and he wants nothing to do with us and he “forbids” his people from hanging out. Exactly where does his ego think he has the ability to tell someone who they can or cant hang out with. Its funny and pathetic at the same time.

Damn I am glad I dont have any whiners like that in my clan.

Sorry I just thought it was funny and I wanted to actually write somewhere why I dont go on thier server (because it sucks) but I didnt want to post it on the forums in an “official capacity” here I can vent and its personal 🙂

besides I wanted to post another day in a row and this was a fun subject.

I am tired

Ok, I have had about my last dream of being poor (dreamed all night that we were living under a bridge, lol this probably has something to do with the wife’s rant). I am tired of not being able to buy my wife decent things. I am tired of not supplying her with the stuff she needs to sew. I am tired of looking in the fridge and wondering what the hell are we going to eat now and in general I am frigging tired of no money.

This may seem random but for almost two years now I have been a student, lived on loans and been poor as shit. I am tired of the fact that we don’t have a car because we are too poor (dont get me wrong, going to school we have found we don’t need the car and we get along well without it, but I am tired as hell of being stuck in a house on Sundays and anytime after 6pm).

I am tired of finals, I am tired of 18 year olds that I have to listen to who tell me how they have seen life. they haven’t seen shit. I am tired of teachers that dont give a damn, dont help thier students and in general are just fucked up. 

I am tired of having to save up so once a month me and wifey can go to Denny’s. I am tired of not being able to repair my computer. I am tired of my teeth fucking falling apart and I don’t have the money to do anything about it. I am tired of everyone telling me “you only have two more years, (ya right, its closer to 3). I am tired of in-laws that are freaked out at me, I am tired of sisters that only call me up to use me. I am tired of friends who end up owing me money and weeks later still cant finish paying me.

Funny thing is I have gotten my forth notice from the military trying to get my interest (lol I would figure they dont want a 31 year old, chunky out of shape guy, but I guess they get desperate). I have seriously considered this. I am sure the spousal unit doesn’t think I take it serious  (I have) but right now I am sooo tired of not having a steady paycheck, I am soo tired of cranking out 12,000 of debt every year and I am sooo tired of not being able to afford shit.

I am seriously considering at this moment of going down to part time (6 credits a quarter – so I dont have to start paying back loans and I can continue my education at a slower pace) and going to work full time so we dont have to borrow any more money from the government and so we can afford to go out to eat, buy things we want and have some enjoyment. I am too damn old for this shit to be this poor and not try and fix it.

I am also damn tired of everyone telling me to not stress, by far this fucking pisses me off the most. They dont have to live in my mind or my situation, most of these  people can always go back to mommy and daddy, yet for some perverse reasons the gods have decided to have me born into a family that i have to support. Unlike every fricken one else that i know.

They all have parents they can borrow from or at the very least the parents are able to take care of themselves. Me, I am born into a family where I have  to support my fricken parents because years of drug and alcohol abuse have fucked them up, their bodies and their minds. I mean don’t get me wrong I  love them and thats why I try and support  them when I can (and when I make enough money to buy land I will move them on to it) because I do believe in taking care of them, but I get soo damn tired of everyone else just patting me on the back and saying they understand. No they don’t, lying pieces of shit.

I am friggen tired of being poor, at this exact moment I am not sure what I am going to do, but I need to alleviate our money problems.

Sorry, I am going to stop now because now I am just winding up tighter and getting angrier and its not something you guys deserve.

Dream 2-14-2003 (Happy Fucking Valentines day)

Ok, I just woke up from a fucked up dream so I figured I would start writing them down.

It was afternoon, I think it was Bellingham but its hard to be sure. The wife and I walked into this small shop that contained a lot of alternate lifestyle (eg, punk not gay) items. They had a lot of books, rings, whips, etc just about anything I could think of. The people that ran the shop were a couple. A super skinny alternative looking boy and his girlfriend who was also super tiny.

They both were mostly unclothed, barely had enough clothing on to be allowable in public, but I didnt mind to much. We wandered around the store, there were some cool things but nothing outstanding. Of course the guy was long winded and had the “I am so cool” attitude and was dismissive towards me, focusing all his energies on the wife (this should have been a warning sign to me, but all I felt in the dream was an annoyance at him, the way he acted to me is very similar to the way most of the people Doug and Jay hung out with acted towards me).

Meanwhile the cute punk girl was jabbering to me about things, I really wasn’t going to buy us anything because we were broke but I looked up and the wife was picking up things she liked so I was going through my wallet, its rare when the wife wants to actually buy something so I generally like buying it.

She brought over a large stack of stuff to the guy behind the counter, meanwhile the girl was jabbering to me quietly about different books, etc. I was leafing through a book when out of the corner of my eye I see The wife pull the boy’s pants down and start giving him a blowjob. I looked up confused for a moment, the punk girl was right next to me and mostly naked now, I got the impression at that exact moment that I could have sex with her if I wanted and nothing seemed untoward about the situation.

All of a sudden the I got the same exact gut wrenching feeling of rage that I haven’t felt in a long while, the urge to cave the punk boy’s head in .

The rage hit me so hard I immediately woke up incredibly angry and hurt. I still am feeling the same angry buzz I felt that night. I just don’t know why I am so upset.

I will stop now, I have no idea what I am doing or saying and Weylin just woke up and is roaming around so its not a thing I wish to dwell on. It was just a gut wrenching dream and I felt I needed to start a dream journal to maybe work through some of the fears/feelings I get from the dreams.