Tattoo Update

Just an update on my back tattoo on Christmas Day 2012 (12/25/2012). Down to only two or three more sessions. When I get it finished I will get closer photos so you can see the details (there are a lot of details).

Also, I am trying to put more pictures up of myself. I have a lot of body issues with myself, its a reason there are very few photos of me compared to my family friends. I have lately come to the realization that I need to accept myself, and the way I look. I am going to continue to try and get healthy, but I need to accept I am heading for 42 and the odds are a lot less likely I will ever be skinny again then when I was 30 (and honestly I was about this size then). I just need to realize that others will either find me attractive or they won’t, and it is their loss if they don’t.

Decrepit Building

I just woke up from a horrible dream. Not a zombie, nightmare infested dream but one that could happen.


We were at an older house, one that had fallen into a lot of disrepair. It belonged to an old lady who I never saw the face of, but we could hear in the background freaking out about the fact she might have to leave. We decided to start cleaning in the kitchen, anything to get her place into a liveable condition. The kitchen was pretty darn bad, it looked like one of those “hoarder” type setups, full of garbage and other debris, along with a broken down feeling.

I started cleaning the walls and noticed they were a weird stucco type texture. As I dug into cleaning, I realized they were stucco because of dirt, grime, but especially because of bug eggs everywhere. As I cleaned, the eggs would hatch, mostly cockroaches, but other types of bugs. This isn’t very surprising, I do have a weird phobia with roaches and of course if this was a bad dream it would have that.

It was at this point I noticed the floor had holes in it. It was an old style wooden floored building. However, the hole was pretty big around, I would say almost a foot across. As I cleaned I noticed more and more insects crawling out. Over a couple minutes that I kept killing them, the insects were larger and larger as well. I eventually yelled back at the old lady that she has to come with us as I woke up trying to get her to move.


Now, that may seem like a weird dream. However, at the end I realized it was about my parents. My parents are having their health decline severely lately. They can’t clean as well, which we help with, due to inability to reach places. Their apartment isn’t like the one in the dream. Except two large issues.

The first issue is the floor by the second door into their living room. It is rotten through. You can feel the floor boards give under the carpet that no matter how often you clean, it begins to develop a mold (I assume its because the floor pushes through to under the apartment crawlspace). Supposedly they have talked with the landlords and the landlords are trying to figure out what to do about it. The problem being is my parents don’t want to move. They love the apartment and they are scared to. So it sounds like the landlord is trying to figure out if they can repair the floor while my parents stuff is there (I could repair it, but landlords are always funny, if my parents have even really talked with them).

The second issue is something I can handle, its just a bit of money up front. ALL of my parents furniture is used, ratty and pretty much destroyed (well not pretty much, it is). They haven’t had new furniture in decades, all of these are things that were at goodwill and they have had for 6+ years, or things my dad has been able to find and bring home. They have already agreed to let me buy them a used sofa/couple of padded chairs to replace them, I just haven’t been able to do that lately.

I think I am going to need to do that next weekend. The furniture is incredibly bad due to their health, but especially because of their dog and  just the fact it is old furniture. They were fortunate and got a new bed last year so that part is good, the bed is in good shape. I think I will contact the local “We Care” and see if they have any good used furniture for sale. I saw a few years ago they carried some nice stuff, and its for a nice charity. If not I will have to go to another place. I will also have to rent a U-Haul pickup, theirs is dying, to deliver the old stuff to the dump and the new stuff back to the apartment the same day.

Well, I am starting to calm down. I doubt I will sleep the rest of the day, but maybe I will play some video games or something.

Long Update

I woke up this morning incredibly angry. I don’t mean “in a bad mood”, I am talking a rip-roaring I would like to crush someone’s nose under my fist anger. I do feel much better now, the wife and I went to the mall and got her some shirts, she then got me fed.

I am sure some of my anger comes from no time, finals decompression, and the fact we just got our electricity bill (double what it normally was), it just adds up. Actually I was angry enough that I called up work and cancelled coming in today (and no, I don’t want to run a game or have visitors today either, just not in the head-space to share my world paradigm with anyone but W, I love the rest of you, but we had already planned not to play today so this wont change anything except it will give me a breather from all my responsibilities, game still on 23rd). Mostly I cancelled today with work because there is no way I could handle my manager.

There is a lot of ranting, to save your friends page and to avoid making you have to read my inane ramblings I will cut most of it. I will post about school after I get my grades finalized (and that is another stress factor, how the fuck long does it take to grade a multiple choice test)

I will start with the Xmas Party. The wife and I have both been a little tense about this. Anyone who knows me, knows I don’t really fit in with the upper class. I like my coworkers, but there is not very many of them I have any similarities with.

The wife and I started Saturday looking for presents. We are supposed to buy $10 presents each for a blind gift exchange. This was annoying because when I signed up for the Xmas party, I was told there were no gifts required. I don’t have a problem spending $20 total, but honestly we are still pulling ourselves out of the hole, and I hate the consumerish pressure that gets given out at Christmas.

We end up going to the “Lucky Monkey”. It’s downtown, and its a very neat little import/kitchey type of shop. After several minutes of looking for two $10 gifts  we end up getting two identical presents, they were little wooden gift boxes with different types of tops (different designs). In each one we bought a “lucky kitty” statue and a Guatemala Worry Doll to fill up the box.

We leave the house at 5:30pm, the dinner is at some restaurant named “Grammy’s”. We get there at 5:45 (party starts at 6pm). There we met Dr. C and his wife. Dr. C is an awesome older man, his wife is very nice, but I think very aware of her station. We stood around looking scared (wife and I) as more and more people arrived. Soon it was packed with 26+ people, I knew half, the other half were of course the first half’s significant others. The wife and I both still kind of stood around, not really fitting in we were talked to by a few of the workers, and my manager, but not for very long. 

The wait/cook staff actually talked to us quite a bit more, we all discussed the world and how things were going and in short I was pleased with the mingling we did with the staff.Dr. C’s wife seemed a bit put off by the fact that wifey and I did not drink, we asked for non-alcoholic drinks (which the staff happily gave us).

Dinner came (an hour after the party officially started, we were starving). We sat next to P and her husband G (names hidden for their privacy). They are both pretty nice (P is the one who works my M-Th shifts now that I am in class). Her husband works as an engineer for a security firm and they both seem very down to earth. L (a dental assistant), El and her Husband (also a dental assistant sat with us along with Dr. C and his wife).

Dinner was awesome, I take my hat of to Grammy’s. True, Gabe cooks better, it by no means diminishes how well they did. I had a vegetarian alfredo dish with Portabello Mushrooms. It was good (but would have later effects I may or may not go into). Dinner at the table went by relatively smoothly, the wait staff kept checking up specifically on me and W and I think it annoyed Dr. C’s wife that they didn’t ask her nearly as much if things were going ok. Its sad, even though I know in my future as a CPA I will have to go to shindigs like that, I would rather be on the other side of the register (working as part of the staff), I am just not comfortable with the official dinner like proceedings.

Oh I forgot to mention the wife and I never approached the appetizer bar before the dinner, it was surrounded by coworkers/significant others and they wouldn’t let the work staff in to refill the appetizers, it was like they didn’t even notice the work staff. I always wondered if thats how it was (you hear it sometimes in movies and books that the help are “invisible”).

After dinner Dr. C’s wife announced that three of the plates (one at each table) had a note under it saying “Merry Christmas” it meant whoever had it won the christmas center piece at each table (really was looking to me like a Kmart center piece of red and green, although I am sure it came from a upper income store). For some reason at our table no one had a note, so Dr. C’s wife had us all pick numbers.

I ended up winning it, however just as I won it, someone at another table had a second note (the notes were not evenly distributed). I told Dr. C’s wife by all means give the center piece to that person, they won it fair and square. Later El commented how gracious I was, I neglected to tell her I thought the center piece was horrible looking and I didn’t want it to begin with, she didn’t need to know that.

After the meal we were informed that we were to go back to Dr. C’s house. The wifey and I got outside and found it incredibly funny to see all these new cars (Lexus SUV, Mercedes Sedan, brand new Ford Ranger pickup) and then there was our rusted out 1989 GMC pickup. We were amused because we knew out of 13 cars, we had the only one paid outright. Sometimes I just look at the money people spend on “high end” products, I just don’t even understand.

We got to Dr. C’s house and it was huge. It was wired for outdoor music, and literally couldn’t have been smaller then 5,000 square feet (and I am sure it was quite a bit bigger then that). It was on prime beach front property and the inside everything was “Neiman Marcus” style. The only really funny thing was there were pictures of their dog “Buster” everywhere.

Now, during this whole time Dr. C would go out of his way to entertain everyone. Please do not confuse my amazement at the height of consumerism going on to imply that Dr. C was nothing but a very genial host who made sure to talk to us repeatedly and to try and make us feel welcome (Dr. W and his wife also were very very nice, Dr W’s wife was a very down home kind of feeling to her, I like her alot).

Dr. C went out of his way several times during the night to offer me and W something first (refreshment, pie, etc). This was going fine and there were numerous tiny conversations we had with others that will probably get talked about over time. Eventually there was the “gift giving” phase. It consisted of us setting all of the gifts in the middle then drawing random numbers. The idea was, when it was your turn you could select a gift and open it. There were two additional gifts (given by Dr. C’s wife), one was a “very good gift” the other was a “gag” gift. Those gifts could not be opened. A person would select a gift they wanted. The next person in line could then either take the first person (or any previous person’s) gift or take a new one. There were lots of funny moments (the digital tire air pressure gauge was very popular and even though it was taken from W by Dr C’s wife (who didn’t even really want it, she just did it to stir things up) I was able to get it back for her and secure the REI card.

It was a cut throat game though, I didn’t think anyone would really push to get those two “unopened” but I saw no holds barred greed as people kept grabbing for those two gifts. Actually it kind of made me sick, it seemed inappropriate for a “Christmas” party, somehow I think Jesus would not approve.

As the party wound down I talked with Dr. W about what I was doing next week. He mentioned that we were very short on time and things had to be done in 10 work days. I looked at him confused and mentioned that the manager had said it would take much longer. Dr. W’s wife looked unhappy for a brief second that my manager thinks that. I then reassured Dr. W that I would take care of it. for him

This means I may be working a lot of hours next two weeks (although part of me wonders if it wont be that bad).

The wife and I then left, came home whereupon I spent most of the night with my stomach/reflux killing me.

So here I am exhausted, in a bad mood from lack of sleep and unable to do anything but nap.