I am posting this as a combined post for Friday, Saturday and Sunday. That is because all we are doing is huddling in the hotel room, hubby is sleeping a lot and we are just waiting for the healing.
I did end up going out to get him food in the 105 degree heat, yes that is how much I love him :).
So all I really have are a few pictures to share.
There we go, that was the boring three days. More to come
Day 5 was relegated to just a few things due to the hubby getting out of the surgical center.
I woke up fairly early and was tired but happy. I was excited to bring him back with me today. I wasn’t up very long before the hubby was chatting at me on iMessage. We both have been missing each other so I wanted to get into the hospital early to talk and hang with him until he checked out.
On my way to the surgical center I decided I wanted to try a local coffee shop, I asked Wolsey if he wanted some and he said no. It looked a lot like a coffee shop in Seattle. The name was Echo Coffee, and while I won’t say it “wowed” me with the coffee, it was acceptable (if not quite hot enough).
When I got to the surgical center I found the hubby gossiping to the nurse. He was telling the nurse about the incident that occurred in Philadelphia, between me and a “barista”. It wasn’t bad, but it was pretty funny.
When I was in Philadelphia for work training, I went to this small bodega (really small) that sold coffee. I asked for a large cup of black coffee and they handed it to me. I took a sip, and before I could even think about it I had said “NOPE!” and in one motion handed it back to the cashier. It had to have been on the burner for hours.
It was a horrible burnt coffee. I feel I wasn’t being picky, it was just foul. The cashier seemed confused on why I didn’t like the coffee. Before I could say a word, one of the other people in my training in Philadelphia said without prompting, “Oh he is from Seattle” as if that was all that was needed.
The weird thing is the cashier gave me my money back, apologized and when I came in later that morning had fresh coffee. I still felt bad I had said nope and handed it back to them before I had even consciously registered it.
I met with the hubby and he was in his normal good spirits again.
The rest of the day consisted of me going back home, because they weren’t ready to release him, then coming back to the hospital and talking to the doc. He was less interested in talking about the hubby’s surgery and more about bicycling in Phoenix 105 degree weather. That is a good sign that the hubby is doing great.
We eventually got checked out of the surgical center, grabbed some fast food and the hubby waddled into the room and crawled in bed. I eventually ended up joining him, and for the first time in a very long 56 hours, I got to lay beside the most important person in the world.
The rest of the day and evening consisted of hanging around the room. The next few days will probably not have much happen as he lays down and heals.
I am so damn happy to have him back. I don’t think I could explain enough.
Day 4 has come and gone and it was less exciting then other days.
The morning started out bright, sunny and warm. I believe it was 79 degrees when I went to visit the hubby in the morning around 6am. I know it was pretty, and I can tell there should be color there, but unfortunately for me it is pretty grey. However, for your enjoyment the photo is color.
Today was fantastic. The hubby was rested up a bit more, he was feeling pretty good and was more talkative. He still occasionally drifted off, but we spent a lot of time on and off. I ended up going over I think it was four times. I would stay for an hour or two, come back to the hotel room. I would have stayed longer but I think I was having heat issues, it is too damn hot.
I went and picked up some lunch/dinner between third and fourth visit. Wolsey had mentioned people don’t buy ice cream and go home with it when they eat out, that it melts too soon. I will be honest, I thought that was bullshit, so I went and ordered two cheeseburgers and a small shake from McDonalds. I was in an air conditioned car (that was chilly), went through drive through and went straight home. The shake was in good shape when I stopped at the hotel. I got out and walked about 40 feet to the door to inside the hotel, then another 100 feet, I got back to the hotel room and it was completely melted. I had been proven wrong, and hubby was completely right.
Torie did feed Ghost tonight as well, she sent a picture, evidently tonight was not as good. We have five more nights to go, but he will be ok, probably just a little feral. I am grateful that Torie is doing this, he would have been so much worse in a kennel.
I collapsed in bed and napped a little. Then went back and visited him for the final time. I got back and was anxious that he wasn’t there so I did some Order of Battle let’s play (military strategy game). I then crawled in bed and was completely exhausted.
Oh, and I was awoken by HBO playing Crimson Peaks, and one of the spirits was screaming, ya that wasn’t fun.
Today is S-Day, Surgery Day. Wolsey and I didn’t sleep much at all overnight, between his surgery prep and general anxiety we both were a bit on edge. Oh, did I forget to mention that at 1am our fire alarm began beeping, signaling it was out of battery. Fortunately Wolsey took the lead and fixed it by taking the alarm down (after contacting the desk).
We were up at 0415 and nope, we weren’t feeling any better than 1am. We gathered our clothes together, got dressed and headed out to Greenbaum Surgery Center at 0500. It was completely empty outside. If this was Seattle the roads would already be busy, but everything was empty.
We arrived to the dark surgery center and sat there watching conservative local news for about 20 minutes. It was then that Wolsey checked in, signed off the paperwork and got ready for surgery. I have to say the receptionist was absolutely the most supportive receptionist I have seen. It was very reassuring.
We sat for awhile, watching horrible news, surfing the net, until they came out and asked Wolsey back. He disappeared for about 30 minutes when they came out and got me to come back. I sat with him for awhile, got to see Dr. Webb, and Wolsey’s anesthesiologist (sorry I don’t remember his name). Finally I got to meet Wolsey’s nurse, a great older man who was joking about his husband (I believe his name was Jeff).
I left, went home and ate breakfast. Eventually I was heading out to go see a movie at 10am when I got a call from Jeff saying Wolsey had successfully made it through the hysterectomy, oophorectomy, and vaginectomy with no problems at all. All that was left was medioplasty. This meant he might be out before the movie was over, so instead I swung by Arizona Territory, a souvenir store and picked him up an Arizona souvenir spoon and an Arizona Ranger badge.
It was hours of waiting for him to get out of surgery. Eventually I got a call that he was out and in recovery. Instead of going directly there (well I went there and found he couldn’t have visitors) I went and had a nice lunch at the local Denny’s. I haven’t been in a Denny’s in years, and the last two times sucked, but this was like the Denny’s from my teen years and was worth it.
I finally got back to the hospital and he was in his room. He was incredibly smiley, still drugged but happy to see me. He was in great shape and between falling asleep he would chat with me. After about an hour and a half I left him so he could fully sleep. I went back to the hotel and laid in bed waiting to fall asleep, I would go into see him as soon as I was up and moving. Damn even one night away from him is hard, tomorrow night will be twice as hard.
Oh, and Ghost had eaten his food yesterday so when our friend came over she found him again not too keen on her being there. I feel bad for him.
The first full day in Scottsdale and I woke up and wandered around outside. It was a chilly 78 degrees (sarcasm) but a beautiful sunrise.
There are a lot of businesses around our hotel. The Lo-Lo’s I talked about yesterday, a Denny’s, a horrible Albertson’s that didn’t have anything we needed and an old school Safeway. The most unique thing I forget is in other states is the over advertisement for guns. Especially when they offer to sell you guns, and give you loans in the same place. Seems weird to be desperate enough to need to get a loan, but hey, while you are here go ahead and buy a gun. I realize this is in Seattle area as well, but not nearly as common.
We then went to the hubby’s pre-op appointment and spoke with Dr. Meltzer and Dr. Ley. It was great to see them again. The Doctors both checked the hubby and everything was good to go. We then got to meet Dr. Webb, the OBGYN that will be doing the hysterectomy, oophorectomy, and vaginectomy. I was amused by Dr. Webb, he seems pretty laid back. Overall seeing all three doctors really reassured me.
We didn’t do much the rest of the day. We went back to the hotel room, napped a bit and waited for the hubby to start his prep for surgery. While we were there, our friend Torie was kind enough to go feed Ghost (our cat). Here he is waiting in the hubby’s computer chair, disappointed we haven’t come home.
Finally at 5pm it was time for the hubby to start his preparation for the surgery, it involved a very uncomfortable drink and a long night. Here he is looking anxious about the process,
That was it for the second day. Tomorrow he goes into surgery, and things will progress. I am both excited and terrified for him. I also love him more than anything in this universe.
Our first day of surgery was fairly exciting and long both at the same time.
We arrived at the airport at 5:00am. Surprisingly both the hubby and I were both fairly good mood. We were pretty excited because this is the first time we had ever flown first class (was done because he doesn’t need to be in coach when he flies back post surgery). The airport security line was short and we were in and getting our coffee before we knew it.
We sat and waited for the plane, and when it arrived we found out it was an Embaer 175. I have never flown a non-Boeing plane before so it was a new thing for me. It turns out the plane itself is some sort of commuter type plane, about half the size of a 747. Even so when we sat down in first class it was pretty good. The seats were bigger than I had sat in, and it was the first time I could sit by the window (my legs are too long and shoulders too wide to fit in coach that way).
We were amazed at the difference of treatment between First class and coach. I am not used to an attendant focused on us. She talked with us regularly (enough so I was uncomfortable), and kept asking if she could get us stuff (also enough to make me uncomfortable). She did seems slightly annoyed we didn’t have our food trays out, until she realized we had never sat in first class before and then she was happy to tell us how to do it.
We got off the plane and went over to the Alamo rental car kiosk. We sat in line for awhile and listened to the sales rep try to talk this family in front of us into extra insurance, satellite, etc. Seriously made me cringe because it was excessive and long winded. I did not look forward to dealing with it.
When we got in, he started in on the same diatribe. Telling us how Arizona is a pay while its out of action state and we need to consider paying the $25 a day walk away insurance. The rough part is we are only paying $45 or so a day as it is, I don’t want to almost double my cost for an extra $250. However, the hubby did something wonderful, when we were talking he referenced me as “sweetie” and the representative immediately looked at us, stopped any excessive sale and barely said a word as we finished up. It is the first time that homophobia worked out for me that I can tell. He just wanted us away.
On our way out, we ended up going to the Papago Park, located in Phoenix. First I need to say it was too damn hot. The dryness I think is better than Atlanta humidity, but I still couldn’t live here. We saw bicyclists (and it was almost 100 degrees) and I was in awe. So the hubby and I wandered around for about 15 minutes, then we called it good.
Oh and evidently there are “active bees” in the area, what the fuck are active bees?
We then went to the Scottsdale Museum of the West, just follow the link for that write up. Although I will say you should go.
After the museum we went to Lo-Lo’s Chicken and Waffles. I have avoided eating chicken and waffles up to this time. I am very glad I relented. I had my first chicken and waffles ever, and it was pretty darn good. Of course I paid for it with indigestion later, but it was definitely worth it.
The rest of the night we planted ourselves in the hotel room, ran to the grocery store, and watched Shark Tank marathon.
My life right now has been all about the hubby’s trip down to Phoenix for his surgery (well first of two). It is the most invasive and has me the most worried. Unfortunately for all of you this means it is one of the few events that I will be chronicling in both luckyslife.com (world of lucky) and accidentallygay.com. I want to share that with people on both sites (and everything I do there). So just a warning ahead of time :).
Oh, we are confirmed for the flight, the hotel and today we are confirming the car. I also confirmed one other thing…
Yes, that is 99-103 degree temperature highs and 75-58 degree lows… I am going to die in Phoenix. So please let the hubby know regularly after I have perished from the heat that I loved him!
That’s it, that is as far as I have gotten. Prepare for more adventure tales from Phoenix!
One of the items about my wife and I’s relationship change is the possibility of children with another partner (from me, not her). I do not want children at all. I am turning 41 soon and I don’t want to be 60 or older going to my child’s graduation. My wife’s health and family pressures right now wouldn’t handle a child to the mix. Since this is an actual worry if I hooked up with someone else I felt I have a responsibility to ensure there are no accidents. So after talking for awhile I decided my most logical option is to get fixed.
So about two months ago I set up an appointment with Group Health to get fixed. It would require an initial appointment with the surgeon, then the actual date of the surgery. Of course, contrary to what people say about American healthcare, I had to wait almost two months to see someone. Eventually I was able to see my doctor, for sake of this journal let’s call her Doctor S.
The wife and I both went to this appointment (her feedback for this and opinion matter just as much as mine). We sat with Doctor S for about twenty minutes. Doctor S seemed unsure about giving me the procedure, especially since I don’t have kids. She kept pushing the fact that I might want children later. I in turn pushed back that I am almost 41 years old and I am happy not having kids. I haven’t felt any regret about children at all. Finally the wife convinced the Doctor to stop pushing for no-vasectomy. She did this by explaining to the doctor that the wife couldn’t afford to get accidently pregnant due to her medical condition. It is partially true, a hormone fluctuation like that could be devastating to the wife, of course she left out the part that she has been fixed since she was 22.
Once the doctor agreed to do the procedure, they set me up for the actual operation. It was three and a half weeks later (which was last Thursday). I have been a little stressed about this for several reasons, mostly the idea of a knife and my testicles doesn’t go well for me.
The day of the procedure I found I had put the wrong time of the appointment down. The wife and I ended up at the Group Health facility at 9am only to discover my appointment was at 2:30pm. I had already taken the valium (and was a little loopy). The office was nice, prescribed me a second valium for when I came back in and we went home. I should note here the wife was awesome. She drove me there and back and she hates driving. I felt so bad that she had done that.
We got the script, and waited around until Torie showed up (she was going to come over after the original procedure to be there for us). She ended up being here before the actual procedure and she agreed to take us down (the wife hates driving and after taking a second valium I was way too loopy).
We drove down and I was brought in fairly quickly. There was a medical assistant that I will name J. J took me back into my room. She was probably the most unfriendly of all MA’s I have met before. She really didn’t have much small talk and sort of ignored me. She had me climb on the table while Doc S came in the room. J disappeared for most of the procedure.
Now, they said there would be just mild discomfort. You know what…. THEY LIED!!!!. S gave me the lidocaine and I suspect she didn’t wait long enough. There wasn’t any actual pain as if she was cutting me open, but she ranked my balls harder then I have never had happen before. I thought I was going to cry. I could feel her cauterizing the tubes (it was a bizarre pressure, not actual pain, but the longer she kept the cauterizing on the more it was uncomfortable).
By the time she ended the procedure on my left testicle, I was really wondering if this was a mistake. She began on the right testicle, and there was very very little discomfort. This is why I suspect she didn’t wait long enough on the first testicle. The second one was mildly uncomfortable, but nothing bad.
S wrapped up. I watched as she took the tubing from inside my testicle and put it in sample jars. I hadn’t realized that the vas deferens (see wiki link here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vas_deferens) looks like rice a roni. It was strange, and just underlines how our bodies are machinery. I guess they keep the vas deferens to prove that they actually did it. I suppose its to protect them against lawsuits if they grow back.
S smiled at me (she had been warmer during the procedure then during our first visit) and said that J would be in to help clean me up. Mainly all of the iodine that had been used had coated my crotch (there was actually very little blood). So S left and J came in. All J did was toss some towels at me and drop off my script. She then rushed me out of the procedure room (I only had about a minute to try and wipe myself down).
I then limped my way out the procedure room, by myself to my waiting wife and Torie. The wife was wondering why the hell the nurse/MA hadn’t escorted me out as I was having trouble walking.
They then got me home (after a quick Dairy Queen stop) and I have spent the rest of the weekend moving around slowly. I am feeling fairly good and I have no regret for this procedure. I just wish that the medical group was more compassionate.
At least within the next couple of months, if something unexpected happens, I won’t have to worry about pregnancy (just STI’s).
Well this is it, I am getting ready to go get snipped and am a little nervous. I have had a ton of people give me good advice so I am not worried about the future. The morning has also been rough though because I can’t get my old LJ to export correctly, so I am now going to go back through my entire 10 years of LJ, selectively pick posts and move them manually over. I am not sure if the new LJ/Dreamwidth codes broke the older exporters or not, but not a big deal either way. I guess this way I can get rid of all the stupid quiz crap 🙂
We also got our first bill from Verizon, of course there is $100 extra in connection fees and they didn’t yet give me the discount for my employer yet (and they wont back credit me when it does go through). So the bill was close to $300. Then of course this morning I get a bill from Sprint for $800, for the ETF and for almost $150 in local charges/taxes/ and misc fees. I really fucking hate Sprint.
Even though this makes me cry, the new phone service is 100 times better and now I am not worried that if my mother goes to the hospital, or my wife has an emergency, that they wont be able to get through to me.
Crap, better get ready to go to Bellevue now 🙂