Matrix Resurrection and January 3, 2022

January 3, 2022

Yesterday went pretty well. First workday back with a full workweek in a few weeks (due to the holidays) and life went really well. Got support from my boss on a difficult audit/monitoring project, that was stressing me out all the time I was off. So work itself, going swimmingly.

After a good day of work, I was able to get to the store and see other people for the first time in almost three weeks. That was a nice thing, even though everyone was kind of crazy and obviously had cabin fever of their own. I only went to the store to get some creamer (you don’t want me without coffee) so it wasn’t a real trip outside.

I felt pretty good about myself yesterday, there is W working in the background. 1/3/2022

I did however get watched by a few guys and one girl. I am sure partially because I am trans, but also I am sure it was a little bit because I felt I was looking pretty good. So that helped a bit with my dysphoria. I didn’t get the stink eye from anyone so I call it a win!

We then kicked back and watched Matrix Resurrection. I may do a breakdown in a future post, but I will say it was good, maybe the best one so far. Ok I don’t count 2 and 3, 2 sucked and I don’t think I even saw 3 because of how much I didn’t like 2.

Everyone says the first movie was specifically a trans narrative. I think it wasn’t quite thought out that way, but you can tell (in my opinion) that Lana and her sister both were processing and just because they put so much of themselves in it, that narrative did peak out.

This narrative was absolutely a queer narrative. I say queer because I think it works for anyone who is LGBTQ (also I think other marginalized groups, but I am not part of them so I can’t say for certain and I am in no way qualified to do so). It was also a narrative for our age group, middle age and older.

I wish I knew who drew this, I would give credit.

We saw the first movie in our twenties/early thirties and now twenty-two years later you watch the new story and it also a narrative of looking around as you hit middle age and struggling with the fact you didn’t do what you thought you might, didn’t make the change in the world you were sure you would, and that things shouldn’t be this way.

It is really a narrative of looking back and trying to compare your current self/situation with what you were in the “prime of your youth”. I liked that, it spoke to me.

Thinking about it, I do think that is my favorite Matrix, although I think it is essential that someone sees the first one before this, and I don’t know if it resonates with people who don’t have the years under them. When you are young you think things stay the same and that you will succeed. It is only when you are older that you can truly get stock of where you are and if you made that goal (hint, you probably didn’t).

So yesterday overall was a good day with work and with watching the Matrix Resurrection. I am really glad W asked to watch that last night.

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